


What If?

by shesherlobster



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-14
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-12 00:49:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15984053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shesherlobster/pseuds/shesherlobster
Summary: What if you could go back and change something about the most important moments of your life? Would you? Would it even make a difference to your present?Series of one shots about the key moments in Charity and Vanessa’s relationship. Each time there’s something slightly different. Do things always end up the same anyway?Chapters are unrelated to each other.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> What if...the cellar lock hadn’t been broken for Finn’s wake?

Vanessa kicks the stool out the way without a second thought as she wobbles down the cellar stairs. It’s difficult in her drunken haze to get down there without falling arse over tit, but she just about manages it. In her head she’s going over what she might say to Charity to give her a piece of her mind, but that train of thought is interrupted by the traitorous part of her brain that reminds her how hot Charity looks in that grey suit. The sudden intrusive thought makes her stop still and she shakes it off as quickly as it arrives.

 

It’s not that she doesn’t think Charity is attractive. She has eyes after all. But it’s Charity. Village bitch and the source of quite some heartache for her Dad. Not to mention the fact she’s a woman. That whole thing with Rhona was a one off. A confusion of love and friendship. Right?

 

So if that’s the case why is she stood here thinking about how good Charity’s ass looks in that suit? Especially when she’s bent over. And now she’s not bent over anymore and Vanessa is looking at the front of Charity Dingle instead of the back and she quickly adopts a look of indifference but she can tell by the tiny smirk on Charity’s face that she’s been caught staring.

 

‘Oh Hey! Super sloshed girl. Brilliant.’

 

Vanessa chooses to ignore the dig at her level of drunkenness, launching into her piece before she loses the nerve.

 

‘You ruined my dad and Megan. Now they’re starting to get it together again but you are still trying to mess it all up. Why?’

 

The lack of response from Charity and the smug look on her face only infuriates Vanessa but she continues her rant regardless.

 

‘Is it cause no one can stand you. Cause you got no friends and no life of your own. You...You are a path...patholo...’

 

The word just won’t come out. Vanessa’s had enough alcohol to make her brave enough to do this, but it’s also just too much to enunciate her words properly. She’s already made one drunken blunder upstairs that Charity took great pleasure in correcting. And now she seems even more amused at this one.

 

‘Pathological?’ Charity helpfully supplies with that damn smirk on her face.

 

‘...pathological interferer. And I will let you out once you have apologised for everything. And then I’ll let you out.’

 

Satisfied she’s said her piece, Vanessa nods and focuses on remaining upright as she waits for a response from Charity.

 

‘You think you could stop me do you? From walking out of here? Think you could... _take_ me?’

 

Charity steps into Vanessa’s personal space, so close that the edges of her blazer brushes against Vanessa’s chest and it takes everything in Vanessa not to gasp. She can smell Charity’s perfume, feel her breath on her cheek. Charity’s height advantage makes Vanessa feel like the other woman is towering over her, dominant and aggressive. It doesn’t scare her though, it does something entirely different that she’s not sure she’s ready to put a label on yet. And then Charity leans forward and for one crazy moment Vanessa thinks she’s going to kiss her. And even crazier than that, Vanessa contemplates if she would kiss her back. But then Charity’s head leans to the side and her lips brush against her ear.

 

‘Nah. You couldn’t handle me babe. I’m going back upstairs now yeah?’

 

It’s all Vanessa can do to stay standing as Charity pulls her head back but remains standing as close as she was before. Vanessa’s mouth opens and closes as she tries to form words, but the entire dictionary seems to have fallen out of her head. It infuriates her even more when Charity smirks at her and with a nod she purposefully brushes past her despite there being more than enough room in the cellar for her to leave without touching Vanessa. A hand runs down her arm and she flinches away from it, still only able to stare silently after Charity as she chuckles and leaves the cellar. Vanessa takes a moment to collect herself. She’s even more angry than she was when she came down here, and now also a little turned on. And that confuses her greatly.

 

Charity is just at the top of the stairs when Vanessa remembers how to use her feet and she takes off after her, her yellow cape swishing in cool breeze from the coolers. She rubs her arms as she takes the stairs two at a time, goosebumps littering them. Vanessa tells herself it’s because of the temperature in the cellar, and not because of the proximity of Charity.

 

‘Charity. Wait.’

 

Charity ignores her so Vanessa does something she’s sure might be a mistake and grabs her by the wrist. Charity whirls round immediately and twists her hand out of Vanessa’s grip easily. Before Vanessa can react Charity’s hands have found her own wrists and she’s being pushed back against the wall behind her, with Charity pressed fully against her front and her wrists being held up either side of her head.

 

‘You want to have a go do you?’

 

The grip on her wrists is bordering on painful, but the feeling of Charity pressed against her is nothing sort of delicious and it makes Vanessa’s head spin. So much so that she can’t find any words to respond, staring dumbly at Charity’s lips instead.

 

‘You’re too prim and proper to do anything aren’t you.’ Charity licks her lips as she looks Vanessa up and down as much as she can while they’re crushed together. ‘Far too _boring_ for that.’

 

Vanessa isn’t sure at this point if Charity is talking about fighting or fucking. Her words are so laden with innuendo they hang heavily between them as Vanessa again fails to respond. At this point she thinks she’d agree to either option.

 

Charity leans in imperceptibly closer, and Vanessa lets out a small gasp that causes the other woman to flash yet another infuriating smirk. It’s like Charity knows exactly what is going on in Vanessa’s head right now. But then isn’t this what she does with everyone? Vanessa has to admit she doesn’t know Charity well but from what she’s seen, she’s all about innuendo and playing games. So surely this isn’t any different. What causes her to think twice though is the way that Charity is now staring at her lips like she wants nothing more than to devour her. And although the fingers gripping her wrists are still verging on painful, the weight of Charity against her isn’t and she’s pretty sure she could push her away and break whatever spell this is.

 

If she wanted to.

 

She’s saved from having to think about it further when Victoria comes running out from the bar, screeching to a halt abruptly when she sees the position of the two women.

 

‘Er...Vanessa you ok?’

 

Charity squeezes her wrists then lets them go and takes a step back. For a second Vanessa misses the feeling of her body pressed against her own. But then she collects herself, taking a deep breath and smoothing down her dress before nodding at Victoria.

 

‘Yeah. Yeah. We were just...discussing a few things.’

 

Victoria seems less than convinced, her eyes flicking between her and Charity over and over. Charity grimaces but nods in agreement. It’s enough of an explanation for Victoria who points to the kitchen and sidesteps past them awkwardly.

 

‘I’ll just...we need more bread.’

 

The sound of the kitchen door swishing closed behind her seems to snap Vanessa back into the present and she nods at Charity then walks back into the bar without another word. When she retakes her seat next to Megan she can feel both her and Tracy staring at her.

 

‘What? I just gave her a piece of my mind and she completely ignored me. As expected.’

 

There’s no denying the wobble in her voice. She takes a long sip of the drink Tracy has bought her in her absence and stares intently down into it. Megan looks like she’d have less trouble believing a pig just flew over the pub, but she nods and thankfully doesn’t say anything else. Leaving Vanessa to mull over what the bloody hell just happened.

 

***

 

Vanessa’s head is pounding as she walks into the pub the next day. She doesn’t really remember much of the previous night after her altercation with Charity. Is that what you’d even call it? She’d decided to drown out the confusion in her mind by drinking an obscene amount of cocktails. And it had worked until she’d woken up this morning on her couch with the superhero cape twisted around her arm and the mask digging painfully into her cheek, and it had all come screaming back to her.

 

So now she’s decided to go and talk to Charity. She doesn’t know why. But her feet seem to have taken her here of their own volition. When she comes to a stop at the end of the bar Charity is doing a crossword and Vanessa can’t help but focus at the way her fingers twist around the pen in her hand. Her mind flashes to an image of how it might feel to have those fingers twisting in her hair. She shakes that thought away immediately as she leans across and Charity makes some sarcastic comment to Priya that she isn’t really listening to. Vanessa is too busy looking at Charity to pay attention to what’s being said. She’s seeing her in a whole different light now. All because of what? One drunken incident at a wake?

 

Charity wasn’t drunk though. 

 

Vanessa curses her mind for pointing that out.

 

When Charity announces her break and disappears out the back without so much as talking to her, Vanessa feels her anger rising again and follows her without asking for an invitation.

 

‘Charity wait.’

 

Vanessa reaches for Charity’s arm just as she starts to push the living room door open, but at the first sign of contact she stops and swings back into Vanessa’s personal space.

 

‘Thought you might have learned last night not to do that buttercup.’

 

Vanessa’s fingers are still clutching the sleeve of Charity’s jacket as she stares into her eyes. She’s surprised to find that she can’t bring herself to let go. There’s a multitude of reasons swirling around her head as to why she shouldn’t feel attracted to Charity Dingle. But in that moment she can’t find it in herself to care. And just like that all the confusion and alcohol induced thoughts become clear as day in her mind.

 

She wants to kiss Charity Dingle.

 

She’s pretty sure Charity Dingle wants to kiss her.

 

And she doesn’t have to wait very long at all to be proved right.

 

‘You know the best thing for a hangover cure?’

 

Vanessa is so flustered by Charity’s proximity it’s all she can do to get out the word ‘No’. It sounds shaky and unsure, much like how she feels in herself. But she does know for certain that if Charity doesn’t kiss her soon she might scream.

 

After a moment Charity reaches up and winds one hand around Vanessa’s neck. Her fingers are caressing the edge of Vanessa’s hairline and it makes her heart skip a beat as she gets pulled ever so closer to those lips she hasn’t stopped thinking about since last night. When they finally kiss, it feels like Vanessa’s stomach falls into her feet. And when Charity’s fingers tighten on her neck to resist against the end of the kiss it’s all she can do not to moan out loud as they pull away from each other.

 

‘Do you wanna come upstairs and find out?’

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if...Charity hadn’t outed Vanessa in the pub?
> 
> I’ve always thought this scene was born out of 100% jealousy and nothing to do with the fact Charity wanted to hurt Vanessa. So what if she was able to think before she spoke in this instance?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also just wanted to reiterate that although I’m going to do these for most part in chronological order, chapters will not be related so in some chapters if things end up differently than they did in the show, don’t expect to see that in the following chapter. :)

‘Please don’t do anything you’re gonna regret.’

 

Paddy knows it’s pointless saying that before the words are even out of his mouth. Charity has always been an act first think later kind of woman and he doesn’t anticipate that changing any time soon. There’s been far too many moments in the past where he’s watched her life come crashing down around her due to her inability to keep her mouth buttoned at key times.

 

‘Who me? Paddy have you seen the state of her?’ Charity does her level best to keep her gaze on Paddy and not a few feet behind him where Vanessa’s hand on Daz’s arm winds her up far more than it really should. ‘Do you think that’s healthy? Throwing herself at him like that?’

 

If Paddy didn’t know any better he’d say Charity is jealous. But he dismisses that idea as soon as it enters his head. Charity doesn’t get jealous. She just enjoys playing games. And from the looks of it she’s about to play another now.

 

‘But that’s not for us to decide is it? She has to make up her own mind really.’

 

The last thing Paddy wants is for Vanessa to get hurt. He’s beginning to wish though that he’d never engaged her in conversation about this. Damn him and his ridiculous knack of walking in on people at completely the wrong moment. If only he’d been ten minutes later getting to the pub yesterday.

 

‘Well. She did.’

 

He tries to stop her. He really does. But all the blustering and stammering in the world won’t stop Charity as she holds a hand up in his direction and stalks around the bar. Paddy holds his breath as he watches Charity approach the table and lay a hand on Vanessa’s shoulder only forbher to jerk back like she’s been burned. He’s fully expecting Charity to make some sort of announcement in front of the entire pub, anything to cause Vanessa untold embarrassment after that. But he’s completely shocked when instead Charity’s gaze lands on Daz.

 

‘You’re barred.’

 

Daz’s brow furrows in confusion as he stares up at Charity. She can feel Vanessa’s eyes on her too but she purposefully doesn’t look in her direction, even when she shakes her shoulder free of Charity’s grip for a second time.

 

‘What? Why? What have I done?’

 

Charity catches Paddy’s eye over the top of Daz for a moment and he pleads with her silently to not make this into an incident. He shakes his head, cheeks flushing red as he looks like he wants nothing more than to rugby tackle her to the ground. The thing is, Charity had initially planned to come over here and announce her and Vanessa’s night together to the whole pub. But now she’s here, the proximity of Vanessa and her big puppy dog eyes looking up at her make her think twice. An unfamiliar feeling of guilt sweeps through her that’s she’s definitely not used to.

 

‘Well your...’ Charity sweeps her arm in the general direction of Daz’s head. ‘Your hair offends me. I don’t want to see it today.’

 

Its a pathetic excuse but it’s all she can come up with at a moment’s notice. She hears Rhona snort and mumble in agreement from her seat next to Vanessa but her gaze remains on Daz. If she looks anywhere else, at all the faces staring at her like they’re just expecting her to be a bitch, she’ll get all defensive and give them what they want. She doesn’t want to do that though. She just wants Daz away from Vanessa. Far away.

 

‘Go on. Off with you. You can come back tomorrow.’

 

Daz looks around him at everyone else with a confused look on his face. The entire pub is watching now but nobody speaks. It’s so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Daz stands abruptly, the chair making a loud scratching noise as it creaks across the wooden floor.

 

‘You coming then?’

 

He directs the question at Vanessa who suddenly looks at him aghast, like the possibility that he’ll want her to leave with him hasn’t even crossed her mind. It hasn’t crossed Charity’s either if she’s honest, and her stomach twists uncomfortably as she awaits Vanessa’s response. She’s too scared to actually look at Vanessa, fearful that making eye contact with her will push her into Daz’s arms purely out of spite. So she listens as hard as she can and tries to burn a hole in Daz’s forehead with her gaze. The seconds tick by and Vanessa doesn’t move an inch. Charity feels oddly elated. She’s not sure why. But that feeling only increases when Daz slopes out of his chair with a defeated sigh and storms out the pub. The second he’s gone Charity feels a whole lot better, relief flooding her body and she finally turns to Vanessa with a triumphant smile on her face, only to find her glowering at her.

 

‘A word. In private. Now.’

 

Vanessa practically drags Charity out the back. She barely has a chance to ask Paddy to cover the bar before she’s being yanked out of sight by her arm. The second they’re in the living room Vanessa lets go of her but promptly rounds on her with such a look of rage it causes Charity to actually take a step back.

 

‘What the bloody hell are you playing at?’

 

Charity chooses to ignore that comment. She’s asked herself that very question in the last few minutes and she can’t really come up with an answer. Normally she’d have taken great pleasure in announcing to the entire pub what her and Vanessa got up to last night. But seeing her with Daz, it got to her in ways she’s not ready to admit yet. Even to herself.

 

‘You don’t have to be scared. You can be gay. It’s fine.’

 

Comedy is her go to response. Sarcasm, wit, whatever you want to call it. Anything to avoid having an actual conversation with actual feelings. Because she doesn’t even know why she’s acted the way she has today. Never mind explaining it to Vanessa. But Vanessa’s face looks so horrified at that statement it almost makes Charity laugh.

 

‘I’m...I’m not gay.’ Vanessa stutters out, but it’s clear even she doesn’t believe her own words. The blush she feels raging on her cheeks does nothing to convince either her nor Charity too.

 

‘Well you were the other night. One hundred percent. Very good kisser by the way.’

 

And there goes Charity’s other defence mechanism. Sex. If it’s just sex she doesn’t have to explain why seeing Vanessa with Daz made her feel a little sick. If it’s just sex she doesn’t have to explain why having Vanessa this close to her makes her nervous. But if Vanessa could make the ground open up and swallow her right now she’d do it in a second. The only saving grace about this entire conversation is that Charity has, for reasons currently unknown to Vanessa, decided to do it in private instead of in front of the entire pub. She glares daggers at Charity trying to figure it out until it suddenly hits her.

 

‘Wait...are you jealous?’

 

Charity snorts loudly and shakes her head but she can’t hide the hint of red that appears on her cheeks. Seeing it gives Vanessa the courage to continue, turning the tables on Charity.

 

‘You are aren’t you. That’s why you barred him. You don’t want him near me.’

 

Charity looks around the room as she bites her lip. She looks anywhere but directly at Vanessa, who is now waiting expectantly with a very smug look on her face.

 

‘Alright fine.’ Charity rolls her eyes. ‘Maybe...maybe I didn’t want him near you. But I also didn’t want you to do something you’d regret. You shouldn’t have to pretend or put on a show. Y’know. Sleep with a guy just to prove a point. Nobody should.’

 

The frankness and honesty in that floors Vanessa. It’s the last thing she’d ever have expected to come out of Charity Dingle’s mouth.

 

Kindness.

 

Consideration.

 

Jealousy.

 

If Vanessa didn’t know any better she’d have thought someone had replaced Charity with an imposter. That must show on her face too because when she doesn’t immediately respond Charity lets out a growl of frustration and waves her hands in the air.

 

‘Yes I’m not a completely heartless bitch. I can be nice sometimes.’

 

She moves to leave the living room, frustration and anger evident on her face but Vanessa catches her sleeve just in time. She pulls Charity back toward her, cradling her cheek with her other hand as she leans in and plants a soft kiss on her lips. She’s shaking with nerves, made even worse when Charity doesn’t immediately respond. But then she feels her returning the kiss so Vanessa allows herself to relax into it. That is, until the door bangs open and they spring apart to face a reticent looking Paddy hovering in the doorway.

 

‘Sorry um, Rhona sent me. She wanted to make sure you weren’t...you know. Killing each other. I can see now it’s...’ Paddy holds his hands up in front of him, making some sort of lewd gesture that has Vanessa’s eyes widening and Charity chuckling. ‘...something else. I’ll go. Don’t mind me.’

 

Paddy backs out the room, pulling the door shut behind him. When he’s gone, the silence lingers on. Vanessa doesn’t quite know what to say. She’s still annoyed at Charity, but she also knows that when she kisses her it’s like nothing she’s felt in her entire life. She takes a step into Charity’s personal space and it surprises Vanessa to see her actually become a little nervous.

 

‘Ness...what are you doing?’

 

‘Ssshhh.’ Vanessa presses a finger to Charity’s lips and shakes her head. ‘Just let me try something a second.’

 

Vanessa reaches up and wraps her hand around Charity’s neck. She lets her fingers tangle in the short hairs she finds there as she pulls Charity against her her. Her lips stop moving mere millimetres away from Charity’s, and she waits for her to close the rest of the distance. Charity duly obliges, capturing Vanessa’s lips with a small moan, her hands coming to wrap around her waist. They kiss slowly and deeply for a few minutes. Neither feels the need to progress it to anything further; they just enjoy it for what it is. When they eventually pull away from each other they’re both panting, but it’s Charity that finds her voice first.

 

‘That...that was um...I’d like to reiterate my previous statement. You’re a very good kisser.’

 

Vanessa smiles but when Charity leans in for another she backs away, stopping Charity with a finger on her chest.

 

‘I need to get back to Rhona. But...’ Vanessa trails off, suddenly unsure.

 

‘But what babe?’ Charity’s eagerness puts Vanessa at ease. She’s like a child trying to find out what her Christmas presents are ahead of time.

 

‘Do you maybe want to come round l-‘

 

‘Yes.’ Charity interrupts before the sentence is even out of Vanessa’s mouth, causing Vanessa to smile widely. She starts to back away, pointing behind her and nearly falling over the edge of the couch because she isn’t looking where she’s going.

 

‘I’m gonna go then. See you later.’

 

Before she knows it Vanessa is gone, and Charity is left on her own in the middle of her living room touching her fingertips to her lips and grinning like a fool.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if...Paddy hadn’t interrupted Vanessa and Charity in the cellar?
> 
>  
> 
> AKA. Basically an excuse to write dirty because you guys have started something now.

‘Who’ll serve?’

 

Even as she says it, Vanessa knows it’s a stupid question. Charity is hardly known for her work ethic and there’s been plenty of occasions when she’s been waiting for a pint only for Charity to stroll back into the bar, not a care in the world. But this time is different because actually, she doesn’t care either. All she can think about is having Charity’s lips on hers as soon as humanly possible.

 

‘Who _cares_ Vanessa.’

 

Charity’s gone before Vanessa can even respond to that and she watches her go for as long as she can get away with.

 

Two minutes she said. Two minutes.

 

Vanessa looks at her watch. It’s been 56 seconds since Charity disappeared. She does a quick scan of the pub to see if anyone’s waiting but nobody seems to be nearing the end of their drink yet. That sends her mind into meltdown about what’s going to happen when she finally makes it down into the cellar, and the idea of Charity touching her again like that sends a thrill down her spine. She stands up ready to slip away quietly when the door opens and her day suddenly gets infinitely better.

 

‘Faith!’

 

She waves Faith over like a maniac, briefly wondering if she looks as desperate as she feels. But that’s ridiculous. Faith can’t possibly know why she wants to speak to her.

 

‘Can you cover the bar for fifteen...no, thirty minutes?’

 

Vanessa corrects herself immediately. Fifteen minutes definitely won’t be long enough for what she wants to do to Charity.

 

‘Oh love I only came in for a G&T.’

 

Vanessa puts on what she hopes are her biggest puppy dog eyes and takes a deep breath. She’s terrible at lying normally.

 

‘It’s Charity, she came over all dizzy and sick. I need to go check on her.’

 

Vanessa holds her breath as she waits for an answer. This could go so horribly wrong. Faith could say no. She could decide she wants to check on Charity instead. She could point out the smoke currently pluming from Vanessa’s backside due to her pants being on fire. But none of those things happen. Faith simply sighs and nods, slinging her bag on the end of the bar.

 

‘I’m having a drink on the house though.’

 

Vanessa nods like that’s her decision to make and hurries out the back as fast as she can without actually running. She feels like a nervous schoolgirl as she descends the cellar steps to find Charity leaning against one of the barrels.

 

Neither says a word as they crash into each other in a flurry of lips and hands. Vanessa finds Charity’s tongue in her mouth almost immediately, needy and desperate and she can’t help but moan at that. And when Vanessa’s shaky hands struggle to pull Charity’s top over her head, Charity herself takes a step back and removes both that and her bra in about five seconds, the obvious need in her actions sends a shiver down Vanessa’s spine. She’s been wanted before. Lusted after. Desired. But never has anyone seemed so desperate to have her. Like they’ll wither up and die if her hands aren’t on them immediately.

 

Charity acts like that.

 

And it’s dangerous. Because this feeling is intoxicating and she knows she’s already in far too deep than she should be.

 

She shakes that thought from her head because right now isn’t the time. They have half an hour until Faith will come looking for them and she’ll be damned if she isn’t done before then.

 

Bending down Vanessa takes one of Charity’s nipples in her mouth, grinning internally at the way Charity moans at the contact. She’s already half way to getting Charity’s trousers off too, pushing her backwards into that chair at the same time so by the time she lands in it with surprised huff, the offending trousers and underwear are around her ankles and Vanessa wastes no time in getting on her knees.

 

‘Babe it’s filthy in here are you sure you want to... _Christ_ Ness.’

 

Vanessa shuts up Charity’s babbling by grabbing her knees with both hands, leaning forward and closing her mouth between her legs.

 

The first time they slept together it had been obvious to Vanessa that this is what gets Charity off the quickest. And that’s what she’s going for right now. Speed. No teasing or taking her time. She works her tongue like her life depends on it until she feels Charity’s legs quivering beneath her fingers and a hand wind tightly into her hair.

 

When Charity’s hand finally lets her go she sits back on her heels with a smug grin on her face, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand. She enjoys watching Charity in these small moments immediately after she comes. There’s a look of peace on her face that only ever appears during sex. Like she’s briefly forgotten all of the worries and hardships her life has brought her over the years and she’s simply happy in the moment. And knowing that Vanessa gives that to her really takes her breath away. As well as being somewhat of an ego boost of course.

 

Vanessa’s brought out of her musings when Charity yanks her up by the lapels of her jacket into a sloppy kiss. Apparently recovered now, she reaches down and pulls Vanessa clumsily into her lap by yanking her up by the back of her thighs. Vanessa settles her knees either side of Charity’s legs and intertwines her fingers behind her neck for balance. As she leans forward for a kiss she feels Charity’s hand snake underneath her skirt and push her underwear to the side, too eager to even bother removing it now they’re in the current position they find themselves.

 

As their lips meet, so do Charity’s fingers with Vanessa’s heat and she moans into the kiss and involuntarily grinds down looking for more friction. Charity duly obliges, slipping two fingers inside and using her thumb to rub back and forth. Her other hand comes to rest on Vanessa’s waist, encouraging her to build up a rhythm as they continue to kiss. It’s barely minutes, embarrassingly quickly Vanessa thinks, before she feels her orgasm approaching and she picks up the speed of her hips and her moaning. She wants to bite down on Charity’s neck to stifle some of the sound but Charity won’t let her end the kiss, her tongue repeatedly thrusting into her mouth and massaging her own.

 

When Vanessa comes her entire body goes rigid against Charity and she cries out. Just as the waves of pleasure are ending Charity breaks off their kiss, and her free hand quickly wraps around her ponytail, yanking down roughly to tip Vanessa’s head back and sinking her teeth into the side of her neck.

 

Vanessa yells out ‘Fuck’ so loudly she’s sure they will have heard her upstairs but she can’t find it in herself to care as she slumps forward against Charity, breathing heavily and resting her forehead on a shoulder. They stay like that for a while, Charity rubbing soothing circles on Vanessa’s back with her free hand, her other still trapped between them and nestled inside Vanessa.

 

When Vanessa finally comes to enough to think clearly again she glances at her watch and lets out a frustrated breath.

 

‘It’s been thirty five minutes. We should get back before Faith comes looking.’

 

Charity raises an eyebrow at the mention of Faith, nodding slightly and shooting an amused look at Vanessa but choosing not to ask for any elaboration. When she withdraws her hand it causes Vanessa to moan lowly, and they kiss for a few minutes until Charity can feel herself getting carried away again. Vanessa reluctantly climbs off her and they straighten each other’s clothes out. There’s a moment of awkwardness where neither woman really knows what to say or do. If they should just leave the cellar without a conversation. Vanessa’s never been good at the whole casual thing. And then the worst possible words are out of her mouth before she even has a chance to think about them, so keen is she to fill the awkward silence.

 

‘Look Charity...I don’t want any misunderstandings. This was fun but...it’s not like we’re suddenly a couple’

 

There’s a flicker of something in Charity’s eyes that Vanessa could swear is hurt, then as quickly as it appears it’s gone and the mask comes down.

 

‘Don’t flatter yourself. Couple of weeks I’ll be bored of you.’

 

Vanessa could curse herself. She wishes more than anything she could take back that statement but it’s too late now. Charity’s words hurt. But Vanessa can’t help but wonder if they were just a defence reaction to her own. She shakes her head, angry at herself and watches the back of Charity’s retreating form as she works her way up the cellar stairs, not even waiting for Vanessa or checking if she’s following.

 

Vanessa sighs and rubs her eyes before making to follow Charity. She stops half way up the stairs when she hears Charity talking to Faith in the hallway. Deciding it’s probably best if she waits until Faith is gone she lingers and listens to their mundane conversation. She never even got to tell Charity about the lie she told to give them this uninterrupted time but Charity doesn’t miss a beat when Faith questions her on it.

 

Years of practice being a Dingle and having to come up with a story on the spot, she thinks, before frowning and berating herself internally for thinking so badly of Charity. She’s vowed she’ll never do that. Make those assumptions and think those things that everyone else in the village does about Charity. Because Charity is different. Vanessa can tell. And she wants to see more. With a resolute nod and hearing Faith make her goodbyes, Vanessa straightens out her jacket and heads out the cellar.


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if...Charity had won Vanessa at the skills auction?

‘I have a bid of eighty pounds. Is anybody prepared to go any higher?’

 

Charity glares daggers at the back of Rishi’s head. If it was possible to will someone to burst into flame, there’s no doubt about it that Rishi would be ablaze right now. It’s not that Charity doesn’t think Vanessa’s worth it. It’s just, well she doesn’t really have the money. And giving to charity isn’t really her thing. Ironically.

 

And of course, Rhona had said that word.

 

_Girlfriend_.

 

There’s a lot of things Charity doesn’t know in this world. But one thing she definitely does know is that she is certainly not girlfriend material. Especially not for Vanessa. Vanessa who is too kind and good and pure for most people in this world. Vanessa who is most certainly out of her league and could probably have anybody she wanted.

 

Except Vanessa seems to want her. And that both baffles and scares Charity in equal measures.

 

So because of that she’s panicking and she’s refusing to bid money she doesn’t have anyway in order to win Vanessa. She was hoping nobody would have wanted to bid on knitting skills. She should have known bloody Rishi would be into something like that.

 

Charity’s so busy glaring at the hammer in Rhona’s hand as she prepares to slam it down that she completely misses Chas sneaking up behind her. Before she realises what’s happening her bloody cousin, who’ll pay for this later on, grabs her hand and wraps it around a paddle and yanks her arm into the air.

 

‘One hundred pounds!’

 

Rhona’s eyes practically light up with glee when she sees that it’s her holding the paddle. But it’s Vanessa’s reaction that stops Charity from yanking her hand back down and smacking Chas with the offending item. Vanessa has the widest smile Charity has ever seen on anybody and her eyes are practically watering. She’s looking at Charity like she just brought about world peace. So against her previous intentions Charity keeps her hand in the air and nods in Rhona’s direction. It doesn’t stop her from stamping on Chas’ foot though.

 

‘Well well. A last minute bidder. Anybody else?’ Rishi moves to raise his paddle again but Rhona completely ignores him. ‘No? Alright sold then. To Charity.’

 

Charity doesn’t get a chance to give Chas a piece of her mind. She’s off serving before Charity can even open her mouth. And then Vanessa bounds over like an excited puppy, leaning over the bar in that way she normally does just to be closer to Charity.

 

‘Think I’m worth a hundred quid then do you?’

 

Charity bites her lip as Vanessa gazes at her waiting for an answer. She doesn’t have the heart to tell her that the bid wasn’t her idea. Despite the fact she’s adamant that this thing between them has no strings, she does care for Vanessa. And contrary to what she knows most people in this flaming village say about her when they think she’s not listening, she doesn’t set out to hurt people on purpose. Not loving, trusting and selfless people like Vanessa bloody Woodfield anyway. Fighting against the panic spreading across her chest she leans over the bar and brushes a finger over the knuckles of Vanessa’s right hand.

 

‘Babe you’re priceless.’

 

The smile that appears on Vanessa’s face at that, in Charity’s opinion, is worth the inner turmoil she’s working through. That smile pushes away the panic in her chest threatening to consume her. It pushes away the urge to lash out and fall back onto her old ways. It makes her stomach flip and churn as she returns the smile and escapes into the cellar to compose herself.

 

***

 

Charity lets herself into Vanessa’s house, much the same way she always does when Vanessa has text asking her to come over. She always leaves the door unlocked, normally because she’s ready and waiting naked in bed for Charity. There was that one time Charity took a little longer than normal to get there because Jimmy was too drunk to take a hint and leave. Vanessa had started without her that night. That’s one of Charity’s favourite moments in recent memory.

 

Today however it doesn’t appear anything similar is happening. Vanessa is sat on the couch facing away from Charity holding two knitting needles in her hands.

 

‘Babe I’m all for kinky but won’t that be taking the pleasure pain game a little far?’

 

Charity leans over the back of the couch as she speaks, her hair falling onto Vanessa’s shoulder as she reaches a little further to kiss her on the cheek. Vanessa jumps off the couch at the contact and sidesteps the coffee table to stand beside it.

 

‘Sit.’ She points to the couch with the knitting needles. ‘And be quiet.’

 

Charity frowns but does as she’s told. She leans back against the cushions and crosses her legs, folding her arms over her chest. Vanessa fumbles with the knitting needles before grabbing a ball of wool off the table, pulling at the end of the thread. Charity watches her with an amused look on her face until it becomes obvious Vanessa isn’t going to talk any time soon so she clears her throat loudly.

 

‘Right. Yes.’ Vanessa almost jumps in the air at the sound. ‘I’m teaching you knitting.’

 

Vanessa nods firmly, then smirks at the look that appears on Charity’s face. Shoving the ball of wool into Charity’s hands she takes a seat beside her on the couch. When Charity doesn’t move a muscle she leans over and plants a small kiss on her cheek.

 

‘Don’t think I didn’t notice that Chas forced you into that bid. You won’t be on the receiving end of any of my... _other_ skills today madam. Now. Watch this.’

 

Charity watches open mouthed as Vanessa fiddles with the wool and needles, paying no attention whatsoever to the words coming out of her mouth. It’s only when Vanessa shoves the offending items in her direction does Charity react, pushing Vanessa’s hands back towards her.

 

‘Oh babe, I’ve just remembered. Chas needs a hand at the pub.’

 

Charity is half standing up before the sentence is even out of her mouth but Vanessa is too fast for her. With lightning reflexes her arm darts out and she grabs Charity by the back of her jumper, yanking her back down into the cushions. Charity lets out a surprised squeak and glares at Vanessa but she seems completely unaffected, again holding out the needles and wool for Charity to take.

 

‘You aren’t going anywhere. Now knit.’

 

The items hang in the space between them as Charity narrows her eyes and glares at Vanessa until finally with a huge sigh and eye rolls she snatches them and holds them up in front of her with a grimace. Vanessa sits back, a triumphant look on her face which only causes Charity’s scowl to deepen.

 

‘Bossy cow.’

 

They spend the next hour bickering about a variety of knitting techniques. Charity sulks like a school child the entire time but dutifully does everything Vanessa asks of her.

 

‘Babe how much longer are we going to do this? Only I’ve got some paint I wanted to watch dry so...’

 

She’s so busy focusing on her stitches that she doesn’t notice Vanessa’s lack of response immediately. It’s only when she glances over that she notices Vanessa staring intently at her hands. She’s also biting her lip and her hands are gripping her own knees so tightly Charity can see the tips of her fingers are white. Charity knows that look. Vanessa is turned on. With a smirk Charity continues to stitch but exaggerates her hand movements, curling her fingers around the wool. She hears Vanessa sigh beside her and is all ready with a witty comment when the wool is suddenly snatched out of her hands and Vanessa’s lips find hers.

 

Desperate hands wrap around the collar of her blazer, dragging it down her arms and throwing it behind them onto the floor.

 

‘What about the knitting?’

 

Charity manages to pull back long enough to get the sentence out before Vanessa’s lips are on hers again.

 

‘Screw the soddin’ knitting. You know exactly what you do to me.’

 

Charity smirks and pushes Vanessa down into the cushions, using the weight of her body to keep her there as she fiddles with the zipper on Vanessa’s jeans.

 

‘Oh I do know. And I’m about to show you too.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if...Charity had told Vanessa she was going to Lanzarote?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay. Real life stuff keeps getting in the way darn it.

They’re lying in bed, basking in the afterglow of yet another round of what Vanessa likes to call the most amazing sex she’ll ever have. Not that she’ll ever tell Charity that. The woman’s ego is big enough as it is. Charity’s arm is curled possessively around Vanessa’s waist, pulling her tightly into her side with her fingertips tracing a light pattern on Vanessa’s hip. Such is the level of Vanessa’s attraction to Charity that the simple touch is heightening her arousal again already, mere minutes after Charity had given her the third earth shattering orgasm of the evening.

 

It’s not that she didn’t like sex in the past. Quite the opposite in fact. But with Charity, everything just seems... _better_. And Vanessa can’t get enough of it. Ever since Charity’s declaration of feelings in the street their sex has become even more intense, Charity adding a tenderness to her touch that hadn’t been there before. It’s as if she is allowing herself to let her feelings show. Vanessa hadn’t intended to play hard to get with her angry exchanges with Charity.

 

_I’d rather poo a porcupine._

 

_You’re boring me._

 

But it seems to have worked, and the power in their...whatever it is, seems to have shifted towards Vanessa. She’s careful not to overdo it though. Charity is still very much a scared animal, ready to run at any moment should things get too much. Which is why Vanessa is taken by surprise when Charity breaks their comfortable silence with a reluctant apology.

 

‘Babe I’m really sorry but I can’t see you for the next couple of weeks.’

 

Vanessa lifts her head where it’s been resting on Charity’s shoulder, propping herself up with a hand between Charity’s bare breasts. Her skin is still warm and clammy from the evenings exertion, but the feeling of Charity’s heart beating away beneath the skin soothes Vanessa more than she would ever admit at this stage.

 

‘What? Why?’

 

Vanessa cringes inwardly at how desperate she sounds. She’s sworn that despite Charity’s admission that she cares, she’ll continue to remain laid back and let Charity dictate the pace of their relationship. Sounding like a needy lover at the prospect of a few days apart doesn’t exactly fit in with that.

 

Luckily, Charity seems touched by the reaction though. She takes Vanessa’s hand from where it rests on her chest and intertwines their fingers together before squeezing and letting both their hands return to her chest.

 

‘I’ve booked a holiday. Just me and the boys. Lanzarote. I need to get Noah away from Joe before he...’ Charity swallows down a lump in her throat so large Vanessa can practically see it with her own eyes. ‘Before things get any worse. We just need some space.’

 

Vanessa nods, then rests her head back on Charity’s shoulder with a sigh. She gets it, she really does. Charity’s children always come first to her, despite what most people in this village think. And if escaping to another country is what she thinks they need, then she’s ok with that.

 

‘I’ll miss you.’

 

The words are said so quietly that Vanessa nearly misses them, so concentrated is she on her own thoughts. She feels Charity’s grip on her fingers start to loosen and move away in reaction to her lack of response so she grips them tightly and rearranges their hands so that hers is flat on top of Charity’s, both feeling Charity’s now racing heart underneath her skin.

 

‘I’ll miss you too ya daft mare. Who else will wake me up with their snoring every night?’

 

Vanessa can’t help but smirk at Charity’s affronted glare, her eyes shining with gratitude at Vanessa’s innate ability to know when Charity needs the mood lightened.

 

‘Paddy snores louder than an aeroplane. I’m sure he’d love to share a bed with you.’

 

Vanessa wrinkles her face in disgust at that particular image, her mouth open and ready to come up with a reply when Charity untangles their hands in order to run a soft finger across her forehead and down over her cheek. Green eyes stare intensely into Vanessa’s, the light mood suddenly gone as Charity chews on her lip before seemingly making up her mind about what she wants to say.

 

‘I hope nobody else does you know. Share this bed.’

 

Vanessa’s breath hitches in her throat at that admission. It’s one thing for Charity to admit she cares about her. It’s quite another to hear her saying she wants Vanessa all to herself. Vanessa reaches over and repeats Charity’s previous action, running her thumb across a worried frowning forehead and down over soft lips.

 

‘There’s nobody else I want here except you Charity.’

 

The words hang between them, a small smile slowly making its way onto Charity’s face as she nods.

 

‘So when are you going?’

 

The smile disappears immediately and is replace by a guilty look as Charity shifts slightly away from Vanessa in the bed.

 

‘Um, well the thing is babe, it was kind of a last minute deal. Soooo, tomorrow?’

 

Charity stares down at the sheets between their bodies, waiting for the inevitable telling off from Vanessa. When it doesn’t materialise she chances a glance upwards and is surprised to find Vanessa smiling at her. A soft hand pushes her gently onto her back, and Vanessa hooks a leg over her waist as she leans down for a kiss.

 

‘Then I guess we better make the most of tonight hadn’t we?’

 

***

 

Vanessa grumbles to herself as she struggles through the front door with a variety of shopping bags. It’s been a terrible day and all she wants to do is take a long hot bath and relax with a glass of wine. She knows Charity is arriving back from Lanzarote this evening but she hasn’t heard from her since yesterday so she’s assuming it’ll be tomorrow before she sees her.

 

Whilst Charity has been away she’s been sending Vanessa a constant stream of text messages and pictures. At times Vanessa has felt like she’s been on the holiday with them, there’s been that many. Not that she’s minded; it beats Charity going away without so much as a word, which if she’s honest is what she half expected. Of course the pictures she received later on in the evenings were of particular interest to her, and she plans on reviewing them again once she’s in the bath.

 

She kicks the front door shut behind her and wobbles into the living room, stopping dead when she sees Charity sat at her kitchen table with a small bag in front of her. Her shopping drops to the floor with a thud as she stares open mouthed at Charity, who smiles widely at her and spreads her arms as wide as she can.

 

‘Surprise!’

 

Vanessa doesn’t respond with words. She crosses the living room in three large strides and takes Charity’s face in her hands. Her eyes scan over the tanned skin briefly, taking in the features she has missed so much the last couple of weeks before surging forward and kissing her passionately. Charity responds immediately, her hands finding their way into Vanessa’s hair as she moans into her mouth, their tongues sliding against each other over and over again.

 

‘Not that I’m complaining.’ Charity breaks away, breathless. ‘But what was that for?’

 

Vanessa is hunched awkwardly over Charity, so twists to the side and seats herself in her lap. Charity’s hands slide down her arms and around her waist, pulling her in closer as her mouth nuzzles in Vanessa’s neck.

 

‘Do I need a reason?’ Vanessa moans when Charity licks a particularly sensitive spot behind her ear. ‘God I missed you. Upstairs. Now.’

 

‘I wish I could babe.’ Charity groans and pulls away with a regretful look on her face. ‘I have to do a shift in the pub. I can come by tonight when I’m done? Pick up where we left off?’

 

Vanessa nods quickly. She doesn’t care one little bit how eager she appears. Having Charity’s hands and mouth on her after so long is all she can think about. She’s about to tell her as much when Charity’s eyes widen and she reaches around Vanessa to the small bag on the table.

 

‘I almost forgot babe, you were so busy distracting me. I got you this.’

 

Charity holds the small bag up in the tiny space between their bodies. She suddenly goes shy and when Vanessa takes hold of the bag she has to tug it twice before Charity lets it go.

 

‘Charity you shouldn’t have.’

 

Charity blushes and shrugs her shoulders. She stares resolutely at her own fingers as they fiddle with the hem on Vanessa’s shirt. Vanessa peers into the bag and slowly brings out a small box. Passing the bag behind her onto the table, she holds the box up with one hand and flicks it open with the other.

 

‘It’s nothing really. If you hate it please tell me because I-‘

 

Charity’s rambling is stopped by Vanessa’s finger on her lips. When she dares look up she sees Vanessa’s staring back at her with shining eyes, biting her lip and doing her level best not to cry.

 

‘Charity, it’s...’ Vanessa pauses as her voice breaks and she swallows the rest of her sentence in an attempt to compose herself. ‘It’s gorgeous. Put it on me.’

 

Vanessa hands the box to Charity, who looks down at the contents as if she needs reminding what’s in there. It’s a silver necklace with a heart shaped aquamarine stone hanging from it. Charity gently takes it from the box as Vanessa turns in her lap.

 

‘It’s your birthstone, see?’

 

Her fingers brush constantly against Vanessa’s skin as she moves her hair to the side and places the jewellery around her neck. Everytime they touch she hears Vanessa’s breath hitch, culminating in a gasp and a quiet moan as she fastens the class and kisses the skin beneath it.

 

‘So you like it?’

 

Vanessa simply nods and returns to her previous position facing Charity. She runs a thumb over her cheek before leaning forward and kissing her softly. Charity returns the kiss for a few minutes before ending it and glancing at her watch.

 

‘I’m sorry babe I really have to go. Later yeah?’

 

Vanessa slides off her lap and stands on wobbly legs as she watches Charity walk backwards to the front door. They don’t break eye contact until Charity slips out, pulling the door quietly closed behind her. Vanessa stares at it for a good long moment, fingers tracing over the necklace around her neck.

 

‘Yeah. Later.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I also bowed to peer pressure and got tumblr hehe. So if you want to find me over there my username is the same as here. Send me comments, asks, love, whatever you want. :)


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